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After forgiving Vince Young, everyone wondering if Roger Goodell is okay

July 29, 2010 By 1 Comment

NASHVILLE – It was reported that NFL Commissioner, Roger Goodell, has decided not to punish NFL Titans QB, Vince Young for his fighting at a club earlier in the summer. When tapes were released, Young quickly apologized for the fears of being penalized by Goodell and after hearing the news that Goodell decided not to punish the young QB, he breathed a sigh of relief. Sources say, Young had sleepless nights and feared for his future because of Goodell. He wasn’t even concerned about people affiliated to the victim of Young’s attack to retaliate because “Goodell’s just a bad man.”

The decision not only baffled Young however, but others interested in the story’s developments like Titans’ head coach Jeff Fisher. “Quite frankly, I had already started searching for a new quarterback”, said Fisher this morning. “I figured Goodell was going to do the whole fake ‘meet with young over lunch’ gig and then take him to his basement and torture him and end it with an 8-game suspension.” Many others’ thoughts about the situation and their prediction of Goodell’s reaction weren’t far from Fisher’s. The decision actually got them worrying if this was some sort of prank by Goodell or if he was mentally all right. “This is the most lax he’s ever been about punishing a player, he must’ve gotten hit in the head or something, or may be he got laid last night” said a local Titans fan. Multiple GM’s have also considered having Goodel do a CAT Scan just to make sure their commissioner is still in good health.

Goodell couldn’t be reached for comment on this matter as he was busy reading a children’s story book to a local kindergarten class.

Filed Under: .Headlines, NFL Tagged With: , , ,

Barkley to attend Heat workouts in hopes of getting a ring

July 29, 2010 By 1 Comment

charles-barkleyMIAMI – During a light practice session, we caught up with NBA great, Sir Charles Barkley, who surprised us as usual. The only difference is this time we were shell shocked at what he had to say as to why he was in Miami. At first, we figured he was here for vacation, working on making his golf swing more pathetic or something but Barkley, outfitted in basketball shorts and an undersized mu mu said he was trying out for Miami.

Barkley, lately has been known for his recent harsh remarks regarding Lebron’s decision to join Miami. “After some random kid on an internet forum message board said I shouldn’t be talking because I have no ring, I sat down for a moment and took the night off and thought to myself that he’s right. I need to win a ring to truly establish my name among NBA’s greatest players ever.”

Many fans of the sport and of the league already feel he is rightfully in that discussion. Many even argue that you can’t name NBA’s 50 greatest players of all time without mentioning Barkley, but apparently that wasn’t enough for him. When asked what he’ll do if he does in fact make the squad and win a ring, Sir Charles responded, “I’ll criticize Lebron for jumping ship and then noone can call me out for talking about him this time.”

Filed Under: .Headlines, NBA Tagged With: , , , ,

Where have you been?

July 29, 2010 By 1 Comment

Oh you mean me… my bad.. I haven’t gone anywhere.. but in case anyone else had noticed.. the site virtually “poofed” off the internet for quite a bit. Nothing wrong happened, no i didn’t break anything.. well not intentionally, I know what triggered the whole event but lets just say I took my time getting it back up and running. It didn’t take long for me to do so but figured other stuff had to be taken care of first…

The site is back :D .. that’s all that matters now. I hope for it not to happen again.. so i guess as a side effect of all this now.. my stories are old news sort of.. hey they’re still funny.. just pretend you’ve been in a coma for the past 20 days like my site has and you’ll be lol’ing at the stories again. I’m still gonna get this stuff updated anyways with new stories.. funny as usual..

it looks like not much has happened or not alot since lebron joined the NWO..

lol.. that video gets me everytime! plus it’s sweet hearing some Jimi Hendrix while you’re at it ;) . Plus the usual Lebron hate coalition group is having a blast at the remarks they’re making about him and what not.. well it’s like this.. let Lebron be Lebron.. that’s all i got to say about it.. he doesn’t owe anyone a thing.. he never once said he wants to be the greatest basketball player ever and win 12 rings and 9 MVPs or whatever.. even if he did that, he’d still be hated.. so it’s whatever man.. the heat are just another hard team to beat.. don’t treat that team like they’re composed of gods.. they’re still beatable.. you just have to try extra hard lol..

what u tryin to say TO?

what u tryin' to say TO?

In other news, Carson Palmer is gonna have a choice of Terrell Owens or Chad OchoCinco to throw to. I’ve got to make a story about that on the site. Well that offense has no excuse to stink now.. well.. then again.. they have cedric benson.. one of football’s greatest hoaxes of all time.

Other than that.. nothing else big comes to mind.. but of course if it does.. i’ll keep me posted :p

speakin of posts.. where’s yours? look below

Filed Under: seb's shack Tagged With: , , ,

Lebron to make feature length movie about his free-agency decision

July 6, 2010 By Leave a Comment

large_lebron_hammerCLEVELAND – Not too long after the announcement that Lebron James will be broadcasting his free agency decision, sources now say he plans to make a feature length movie about his tedious decision process. “Lebron is all about the big screen. This is why he skipped being on the USA team this summer.” commented a source. The movie is prospected to be roughly 3 1/2 hours long and film makers are predicting for this movie to be out by December.

Sources also confirm that James Cameron, the same director of Avatar, will be directing Lebron’s movie about the process. We are also informed that the movie is only strictly about the free agency and not about Lebron’s life. There hasn’t been any word on if there is an autobiography movie in the works for later, but we have a feeling it wouldn’t be a just a movie but a multi-season TV series that could rival with the Simpson’s current 20 year run.

Lebron fans as usual are excited for the news, even though they don’t know what jerseys they will be wearing to their viewing parties just yet, they’re just fairly stoked about a movie featuring their most favorite basketball superstar. “This isn’t even about basketball anymore! Lebron is big time! So what if he hasn’t won a championship yet!” said a loyal lebron fan nearby.

Should any more developments come about this, come here first to hear the news.

Filed Under: .Headlines, NBA Tagged With: , , , , , ,

Sebastien3k becomes a writer on bleacherreport.com

July 4, 2010 By Leave a Comment

Yes, it was a long tedious process as during the free agency period I had to weigh my options. 3 of the other top writers in the business were weighing their options too and it even depended on what I aimed to do. One of them even had like a summit and everything it was crazy. Oh and another thing, the fans of rofljock held like a site-wide gathering and sang to the tune of “we are the world” in hopes to keep me writing here.

Ok enough of the self worshiping, I ain’t going anywhere. Why would I? It’s my site and apparently there’s still alotta work that has to be done. This article tho IS about me signing on to bleacher report and publishing some articles there. I’m still trying to figure out what format I’m going to put them in. Is it going to be more humor articles? will i transcribe my articles here to over there? I dunno. I’ll figure it out, but at least this should be cool as it provides another outlet on the internet for us to get known more out there.

I’m also gonna do some housekeeping on here, because even though the site looks professional, which is cool, it’s just missing that “flair”. Ya know?

Anyway here’s my newest internet space :

http://bleacherreport.com/users/324625-sebastien-threekay

I’ll post articles there and post them here and keep them updated and whatnot whatever have you.. you know the drill..

Peace out! and happy 4th of July!!

-Seb

Filed Under: seb's shack Tagged With: , ,

New York Yankees make pitch to land Lebron

July 2, 2010 By Leave a Comment

LeBrons-Yankees-CourtNEW YORK – Just when the free agency period couldn’t get anymore crazier, the New York Yankees announced today that they are going to aggressively pursue bringing in Lebron James to New York. This decision apparently was made because the New York Knicks don’t seem to be exhausting their resources towards their campaign of recruiting Lebron, according to a Yankees spokesman. “We’re a whole lot unsure right now as to whether Lebron would come to New York, unlike 2 seasons ago when we were absolutely sure he’d be a Knick.” he added.

Other major players in the Lebron sweepstakes include Chicago and Miami and they seem to be in the major lead right now as far as swaying king james to join their teams. When asked why a baseball team would go after an NBA player with very little baseball experience, they simply responded that it’s because they’re rich. “Like 2pac says, It ain’t tricking if you got it” replied the Yankees spokesman. We reminded him that 2pac has never said such a thing, but he simply just flashed the HOVA sign at us.

After our meeting, we can say he seemed mysteriously confident in the Yankee chances of acquiring James. “The absence of a salary cap as well as making those Yankees hats he wears mean something should be enough logical reason for James to sign with the Yankees” said a self proclaimed NBA expert Ric Cumla. We really don’t know how he made it into our offices as we didn’t have any intention of getting his 2 cents on this matter. All we can advise however, is to wait like everyone else to see where Lebron goes.

Filed Under: .Headlines, NBA Tagged With: , , , , ,