NEW YORK- Brian Jenkins a local new yorker and for the past five years a Cleveland Cavilers fan, says the anticipation of the looming free agency is killing him. Officially teams are allowed to court unrestricted free agency and attempt to lure them to their teams following the establishment of the salary cap which is set to be released on July 8th. Jenkins states though that he can not wait another minute let alone another 9 days. ” I honestly don’t think there is a bigger cavs fan in the world than me, I even got the mascot tattooed on my calf’s, when Mo decided to head to Hawai during the playoff series with the Celtics i cried, like physically cried but if Lebron leaves then i guess i’m going to have to start supporting a new team”. When questioned if he was a bigger cavs fan than those long term fans in Ohio, Jenkins retorted ” What the hell is an Ohio” after proceeding to point Ohio out on a map Jenkins confirmed that he always believed Ohio to have always been apart of Indiana. After being asked why he would desert the team that he beloved so much, Jenkins supported his claims stating that ” Why would i follow a team that has never do anything bar have LeBron James on it?”.
Similar scenes where reported in Toronto Where a mass migration has been taken place with half the citizens going to Illinois while the other half have fled to Florida.
CHICAGO- Just when we thought the bears were big winners so far in the free agency market, they surprised us yet again. Not too long after the Manumaleuna signing, they announced yet again they’ll sign another defensive player, fortifying their defense around Urlacher.
CAROLINA- After an emotional press conference, Delhomme left fans wondering what team he would be on next, if there was a team interested. Delhomme stated he parted ways with the panthers with no hard feelings but what he’s worried about is that other teams have smart owners. We asked Delhomme to elaborate on this stance because we had no idea where he was coming from.